Thursday, June 10, 2010

Too Much of a Good Thing: Dealing with Food Addiction

I am an over-eater, and this is something that I can honestly say I hate about myself.  I have not come to terms with this behavior.  I do not understand this behavior, as it relates to me.  I even recognize when I'm doing it, but cannot seem to stop myself.  I hate this because it makes me feel out of control, and undisciplined.

It happens when I'm bored, angry, distracted, and other "down" emotional times.  It happens less often when i am feeling active, and happy, and sexy, so I try to keep myself in activities that help me focus on those positive feelings, and stay busy ... too busy to eat.  I am noticing more of these patterns right now, as i am done with school and homework, and not working yet, so the boredom come easier right now!  Keeping my life active and busy, and in a routine sure helps a lot!

I feel slightly fortunate that I mostly choose reasonable foods to over eat; I am not going to eat a whole bag of chips, or a cake, or an entire valentine box of chocolates.  But I will eat more garlic bread than I should!  One time I hate carrot sticks until I feel like I had to go sleep it off!  I like food! I really like wholesome, beautiful, food!  I love food with wonderful colors, and textures.  Foods that have deep aromas that you can taste even before the food gets in your mouth!  I like the way things crunch! I like the taste of butter and salt, and olive oil.  I love the taste of meat, almost any kind, but beef and fish are primary favorites!  Apparently, I like that too-full feeling!  I drink unsweetened tea, A LOT, to try to trick my tummy into thinking it is so full, and a good portion of the time it works.

Portion control is helpful ... because I'm a member of the clean plate club!  Putting the left overs away right away so they cannot be picked at helps.  Eating off a smaller plate helps sometimes.  When my Sweetheart dishes my plate, he does a good job of providing the right portions, and then I don't go back for more.  If we eat out, I always as for a to-go-box when my meal is served, and put half in the box before I even get started.  I don't keep a lot of food in the house, and what I bring home is healthy, so that way, if I do get the urge to over-eat, at least my options will not be detrimental.

My weight has been a life long challenge for me.  I lost 50 pounds and have kept it off for five years now, and intend to keep it off forever!  So understanding this need to eat is still a challenge for me.  I am more fit and healthy now at 42 than I have been in my entire life!  I am loving this new journey, and I am excited to keep growing in it!  Every day I am stronger in my body and my spirit. Everyday I am working toward the goal ... sometimes it is just tiny little baby steps, and sometimes I manage a bound or two! But always forward progress as I learn about me, and the things that make my body healthy or not so healthy.

Living Well is a process or discovery; of trial and error.  I stop living well when I stop trying!
Love to you